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Re: Dementia
[Re: buck_buster]
#4191573
09/05/24 08:28 PM
09/05/24 08:28 PM
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Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 1,787
Sweet Home
Moss
8 point
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8 point
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 1,787
Sweet Home
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Grandfather has it. Its the saddest thing I have ever witnessed. My grandmother is his caretaker, she is 81, he is 86. She is in pretty good health however a dementia patient is alot to deal with.
Right now helping out is me, my sister, and my older cousin and my dad. My uncle stops by and cuts the grass every two weeks and stays an hour and leaves the other kids and grand kids barely even call but they know hes sick. I stayed with my grandmother last night and stayed up with him. He went to bed at 11pm woke up at 1251am... stayed up until about 4:15am. He sits on the edge of the bed, talking nonsense and just moving his hands. Sometimes yelling, laughing etc. Talking to his mom, dad, brother(s) sister, (all are passed BTW) I left at 7am because I had to go to work. Man this is the hardest thing I have ever done. Watching the strongest person you know you lose their mind so quickly. He sleeps during the day and stays up all night. Several times he would not take his meds. My grandmother is doing the best she can do at 81 but I know this is hard on her as well.
Have any of you ever had to deal with it? You need to get him somewhere that he can be cared for before you loose them both. I speak from experience.
O God, you are my God; early will I seek you. Psalm 63:1
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Re: Dementia
[Re: buck_buster]
#4191608
09/05/24 09:20 PM
09/05/24 09:20 PM
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Joined: Jun 2020
Posts: 13,295
Earth
TDog93
Booner
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Booner
Joined: Jun 2020
Posts: 13,295
Earth
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Mom has dimentia in nursing home - but we can still hav conversations and she knows me - but it usually the same conversation but i am still grateful for that.
Dad got dimentia - he would rant - but they put him on meds that calmed him down and he got some what normal again - then few years in heart attack at 74
Hunt the wind - leave it better than you found it - love your neighbor as you love your self
We need prayer for our country now more than ever
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Re: Dementia
[Re: metalmuncher]
#4191652
09/06/24 04:50 AM
09/06/24 04:50 AM
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Joined: Mar 2016
Posts: 2,992
Alabama
OlTimer
10 point
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10 point
Joined: Mar 2016
Posts: 2,992
Alabama
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My Mom moved in with us when she could no longer live without supervision. She was a breeze to take care of as she was never combative and always eager to please. It was just her nature. After several years of slow progression the deterioration accelerated and within a month or so we were burying her.
Within weeks after mom passing, my MIL moved in with us as she too was in need of a caretaker. She's been with us for 7 years I believe and has progressed with her dementia enough that she stays frustrated a lot of the time and isn't remotely as easy to work with as my own mom was. I believe my wife may be near the breaking point but won't concede that it is nearing time for her mother to go to a full time care facility, before she ends up there instead. But there's more.
About a year after my Mom's passing it was discovered that my sister was ate up with cancer. She stayed with us for about the last 6 months she lived along with my MIL. Not enough yet?
On July 28th lightning struck our house and it burned to the ground. 3 days later our daughter's home burned also. Now we are all in an air B&B until we can get a double wide mobile home moved in. Can't wait long enough to build because of MIL living with us. If it was just me and the wife we could just stay at the campground. For now it's a trip there every day to work on cleaning it all up, taking care of the grounds and the animals. I need to bush hog yesterday.
I am SO tired.
I didn't mean to get off track or to ramble but there it is...
Good grief, praying for you fellow.
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Re: Dementia
[Re: metalmuncher]
#4191661
09/06/24 06:03 AM
09/06/24 06:03 AM
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Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 6,116
Hoover, AL
M48scout
12 point
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12 point
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 6,116
Hoover, AL
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My Mom moved in with us when she could no longer live without supervision. She was a breeze to take care of as she was never combative and always eager to please. It was just her nature. After several years of slow progression the deterioration accelerated and within a month or so we were burying her.
Within weeks after mom passing, my MIL moved in with us as she too was in need of a caretaker. She's been with us for 7 years I believe and has progressed with her dementia enough that she stays frustrated a lot of the time and isn't remotely as easy to work with as my own mom was. I believe my wife may be near the breaking point but won't concede that it is nearing time for her mother to go to a full time care facility, before she ends up there instead. But there's more.
About a year after my Mom's passing it was discovered that my sister was ate up with cancer. She stayed with us for about the last 6 months she lived along with my MIL. Not enough yet?
On July 28th lightning struck our house and it burned to the ground. 3 days later our daughter's home burned also. Now we are all in an air B&B until we can get a double wide mobile home moved in. Can't wait long enough to build because of MIL living with us. If it was just me and the wife we could just stay at the campground. For now it's a trip there every day to work on cleaning it all up, taking care of the grounds and the animals. I need to bush hog yesterday.
I am SO tired.
I didn't mean to get off track or to ramble but there it is...
Take care of yourself (and wife) MM. There’s only so much a person can take. You may have to make some tough decisions and let the MIL go to a care facility for sake of the larger family. About a month after my FIL passed I realized the drain and effect on the family and wife was more than I was able to perceive while we were all loaded as he declined. I should have spoke up and did something before it got like it did. Just my 2 cents.
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Re: Dementia
[Re: metalmuncher]
#4191687
09/06/24 07:44 AM
09/06/24 07:44 AM
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Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 12,490
Sylacauga, AL
poorcountrypreacher
Booner
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Booner
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 12,490
Sylacauga, AL
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My Mom moved in with us when she could no longer live without supervision. She was a breeze to take care of as she was never combative and always eager to please. It was just her nature. After several years of slow progression the deterioration accelerated and within a month or so we were burying her.
Within weeks after mom passing, my MIL moved in with us as she too was in need of a caretaker. She's been with us for 7 years I believe and has progressed with her dementia enough that she stays frustrated a lot of the time and isn't remotely as easy to work with as my own mom was. I believe my wife may be near the breaking point but won't concede that it is nearing time for her mother to go to a full time care facility, before she ends up there instead. But there's more.
About a year after my Mom's passing it was discovered that my sister was ate up with cancer. She stayed with us for about the last 6 months she lived along with my MIL. Not enough yet?
On July 28th lightning struck our house and it burned to the ground. 3 days later our daughter's home burned also. Now we are all in an air B&B until we can get a double wide mobile home moved in. Can't wait long enough to build because of MIL living with us. If it was just me and the wife we could just stay at the campground. For now it's a trip there every day to work on cleaning it all up, taking care of the grounds and the animals. I need to bush hog yesterday.
I am SO tired.
I didn't mean to get off track or to ramble but there it is...
Prayers for you and your family. I'm so sorry that you are having to endure all of this.
All the labor of man is for his mouth, and yet the appetite is not filled.
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Re: Dementia
[Re: metalmuncher]
#4191701
09/06/24 08:06 AM
09/06/24 08:06 AM
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Joined: Jan 2013
Posts: 3,253
Alabama
buck_buster
OP
10 point
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OP
10 point
Joined: Jan 2013
Posts: 3,253
Alabama
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My Mom moved in with us when she could no longer live without supervision. She was a breeze to take care of as she was never combative and always eager to please. It was just her nature. After several years of slow progression the deterioration accelerated and within a month or so we were burying her.
Within weeks after mom passing, my MIL moved in with us as she too was in need of a caretaker. She's been with us for 7 years I believe and has progressed with her dementia enough that she stays frustrated a lot of the time and isn't remotely as easy to work with as my own mom was. I believe my wife may be near the breaking point but won't concede that it is nearing time for her mother to go to a full time care facility, before she ends up there instead. But there's more.
About a year after my Mom's passing it was discovered that my sister was ate up with cancer. She stayed with us for about the last 6 months she lived along with my MIL. Not enough yet?
On July 28th lightning struck our house and it burned to the ground. 3 days later our daughter's home burned also. Now we are all in an air B&B until we can get a double wide mobile home moved in. Can't wait long enough to build because of MIL living with us. If it was just me and the wife we could just stay at the campground. For now it's a trip there every day to work on cleaning it all up, taking care of the grounds and the animals. I need to bush hog yesterday.
I am SO tired.
I didn't mean to get off track or to ramble but there it is...
Mercy....... Praying for you this morning brother.
I love the rut. The woods are like a bunch of roided up meatheads fighting over a girl.
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Re: Dementia
[Re: woodduck]
#4191702
09/06/24 08:06 AM
09/06/24 08:06 AM
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Joined: Jan 2013
Posts: 3,253
Alabama
buck_buster
OP
10 point
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OP
10 point
Joined: Jan 2013
Posts: 3,253
Alabama
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Grandfather has it. Its the saddest thing I have ever witnessed. My grandmother is his caretaker, she is 81, he is 86. She is in pretty good health however a dementia patient is alot to deal with.
Right now helping out is me, my sister, and my older cousin and my dad. My uncle stops by and cuts the grass every two weeks and stays an hour and leaves the other kids and grand kids barely even call but they know hes sick. I stayed with my grandmother last night and stayed up with him. He went to bed at 11pm woke up at 1251am... stayed up until about 4:15am. He sits on the edge of the bed, talking nonsense and just moving his hands. Sometimes yelling, laughing etc. Talking to his mom, dad, brother(s) sister, (all are passed BTW) I left at 7am because I had to go to work. Man this is the hardest thing I have ever done. Watching the strongest person you know you lose their mind so quickly. He sleeps during the day and stays up all night. Several times he would not take his meds. My grandmother is doing the best she can do at 81 but I know this is hard on her as well.
Have any of you ever had to deal with it? is he on a sleeping pill. Sundowners he is going through Yes, But it does not seem to be working.
I love the rut. The woods are like a bunch of roided up meatheads fighting over a girl.
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Re: Dementia
[Re: buck_buster]
#4191707
09/06/24 08:19 AM
09/06/24 08:19 AM
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Joined: Feb 2019
Posts: 4,964
Montgomery,al,usa
Davyalabama
12 point
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12 point
Joined: Feb 2019
Posts: 4,964
Montgomery,al,usa
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I watched and helped my mom as much as I could with my dad that had parkinson's and louie body dementia. He would also get sundowners, uti frequently which really messed with his mind, etc. Mom was the best, what a trooper that loved him until the end. You talk about being strong and truly loving someone.
“If you do not conquer self, you will be conquered by self.” Napoleon Hill
The most difficult thing to understand during conversation is silence. Thoreau
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Re: Dementia
[Re: Fattyfireplug]
#4191713
09/06/24 08:23 AM
09/06/24 08:23 AM
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Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 6,899
Sylacauga
CAL
14 point
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14 point
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 6,899
Sylacauga
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My dad has a pretty sharp mind, but he's trapped in a failing body. I think I'd rather not know who I am, than know and be trapped.
Ya'll don't take this the wrong way, but as I get older I'm starting to think Kevorkian was right. I don't know a soul who wants to go out slow. I'd rather have a massive heart attack than a lingering death. Wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy, much less those I love and the caregivers. I fully agree. We are more compassionate towards our pets than humans. Personally, I refuse to be a burden on my family while losing my mind.
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Re: Dementia
[Re: buck_buster]
#4191742
09/06/24 09:23 AM
09/06/24 09:23 AM
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Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 7,947
Monroe County, AL
deadeye
14 point
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14 point
Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 7,947
Monroe County, AL
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Watched my wife go thru it with both parents. Such a cruel disease. You have to face the facts and put him in a nursing home as tough as it is.
A man is not old until regrets take the place of dreams
He alone is educated who has learned the lessons of open-mindedness
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